volume 1
so, i recently moved in to using a quartz instance (open-source, self-hosted) and it was pain to do it but now, i guess i can try it out :D
- below, you’ll see a collection of all my past substack articles (which you can still comment on and read here!)
- idk if i’ll make new posts soon
the teaful revelation
no hate on coffee by the way, tea is just really good
hello, i’m cups… and this is just a little rant.
When I was a kid, I didn’t really drink tea or coffee (thank goodness) but as I grew older, I decided to settle with coffee. Coffee was great, it was energising, and then getting off it was surprisingly … normal? I mean, sure - after drinking so much, I got a little exhausted when I was off it but it was shockingly normal. Not some random internal power outage or anything, it was like removing a tiny part of my routine.
Enough about the coffee talk. Today, we’re here about something much more interesting. I used to hate tea. In fact, I thought tea was boring and bland. My past me would’ve said that “tea was just a bunch of leaves mixed with water”, and while that is right, there’s just more depth to drinking it than what you can see.
Past me would’ve hated me now. Drinking tea like there’s nothing wrong with it. But present me thinks it’s great. Especially fruit teas.
Since I’ve been sick for the past few days, I have been given a few variants of tea with my favourite being honey lemon tea. The taste is just absolutely fulfilling, with a sweet yet lemon-y taste to it.
Anyway, it’s a sharp turn. Moving from one side to another. It’s pretty interesting seeing how me from many years ago and me now has a lot of differences, both in wisdom and drink preferences.
Signing off, 🍵 cupstv
my abhorrent commitment issues
one of the flaws to my social identity
If I said I was a fairly consistent and committed person, that would be a total lie. Say hi to a sliver of my life.
Hello, I’m cups. You can call me David for today, and this is hotcuppa.
As a kid, I jumped from friend group to friend group, and played a variety of games with the other kids at my primary school. Then, I was even able to imagine imaginary/conceptual games to enjoy with others (and oh, how violent my concepts were back then). My life wasn’t solid yet, and so was my personality.
Now, as I am growing older, I’ve come to terms that while my life isn’t solid yet, that isn’t an excuse to keep starting things that I can’t finish. Enter, my commitment and consistency issues (sorry if I tricked you into thinking this is just commitment).
I used to join so many clubs, and start so many projects. I remember joining a Dungeons & Dragons club simply because I had an imaginary mind who couldn’t even ponder the amount of pathways and possibilities a simple narrative outline could be expanded by a bunch of silly and goofy people as a group, who just wanted to have fun and enjoy the world of fantasy. Then, it fell into a sort of boredom, or strictness. A time when the club wasn’t in a good state, and everyone just got busier or got more bored. Sure, the club is still up and running today, but it isn’t the same as before. The thrills, the excitement.
Then, I joined a simple afterschool band organisation. It was a time and place where bands in the school could just jam out, record, or do whatever they want. It was great! It was fun! We had a good time, until the original members of the band had left and we had to replace them, and while the new members were great as a friend group, it didn’t really feel much like a band. Just sort of an event that I had to go to, simply because I didn’t have anything else to do. We’ve temporarily disbanded for a while, so now that’s gone.
Then comes literature/philosophy club, which was great. I was actually one of many who came up with the idea to start one of these, mostly because I just wanted to write like what I’m doing here in Substack. I had great plans, with collaboration from my other writer and artistic friends which never come into fruition. And so, my ideals did not come into reality, and I didn’t have the mental capabilities to have done it since I was a horrible overthinker (and still am) to propose the idea to the rest of the club and the club manager. It became more like a lunch reading club, which is fun but not my cup of tea (unfortunately).
Now, what I’ve just done is give some examples as to why my commitment issues are now so abhorrent. Overthinking even came to this rant. The fact that I’ve just steered away from the intent of this post, I have just proven that I am horrible at committing to these ideas.
But, there’s a good side to it. What if there was never an obligation to finish these tasks on my own, and what if being spontaneous could be a good thing?
Think about it. With a few other couple friends and myself, we were able to start things that people could draw inspiration from. Gatherings where people could enjoy its wonders from those specific clubs, through its original ideals or not. It didn’t have to be finished by me, for the greatest but most tragic of symphonies are those that are unfinished. The pieces that the next generation decides to pick up, to continue, to prevail. It was never an obligation to finish wonders, but to leave them unanswered for people to make something better… something new.
While I could go on to ramble more about these issues, and go into detail with new ones since I derailed this post’s original purpose (e.g. the overthinking), I’d rather finish something first before creating something new. Let’s not allow wonder and the imaginary realm to succumb to the death of our minds because it’s not all about us, rather it’s about the people who will outlive these wonders and succeed due to the foundations that we were able to place in our very reality.
Signing off, cups9
like fiction
If you think about it, life could just be a piece of fiction. Except, it has endless pages… just waiting for another story to be documented.
Hey, I’m cups but you can call me David for today. Welcome to hotcuppa.
Life is complicated. Maybe it’s only me, but I know that we’re all looking for answers or a purpose. That might come from ideologies, theology, or even philosophy but it’s all the same, limited knowledge trying to understand limitless intellect.
I’ve come to terms with this realisation, as I was always looking for answers as to my faith and my purpose. There’s more than that, and there’s always a story to be told.
Sometimes, with the right music or the right circumstances, my life feels like my movie. While you can make a rebuttal saying this is ego-centrical, that’s what I thought as a kid. Now, I’ve realised that my life is just a tiny footnote in a book that still unravels itself until the end of time. Life is like a movie, but really… it’s more like a play. A play, with endless scenes and endless points of view all happening in one moment.
We’re all individuals and we have a crucial role to play. A role to choose right and wrong; our morality, with the will to write the destiny in our very temporal lifetime. Our stories matter, so make it count. Make this life count.
Don’t waste it on temporary moments of happiness. Do you really believe the vices you use give you happiness?
Spend it on bringing joy to yourself and others, through connection and hobbies. Joy worth sharing, joy that makes an impact.
Don’t waste it on selfish luxuries, treasures that don’t carry a purpose. Those with a price, ready to be sold at any time.
Spend it on the memories you can forge and protect with your life, no matter if it’s just a moment or an event worth reminiscing in your lifetime.
Don’t waste it on pleasing people who won’t care about you, only to use you at that final moment.
Spend it on the ones who will love you, and possibly even feed you. Those who will carry you like a cross at your darkest times.
And remember, just saying YOLO doesn’t mean waste it on parties and alcohol. Life is the greatest treasure you’ll ever find. Value it like the most priceless thing you’ve ever found.
Signing off, cupstv
[p.s.] thank you
thank you to all my supporters and thank you for supporting this small little corner on the internet :D